What am I supposed to do Now?
Apparently, I have a look in my eyes which says, “I am about to be a father and I don’t have a clue.”
According to Lynn, I have had a deer in the headlights look on my face since the morning she told me that we were having a baby; October 24, 2015, the day of her 46th birthday party.
That Ship Had Sailed
I guess that may be true, since I was fairly certain that, for me, the “being a daddy boat” had sailed.
I was going to live my life out as a good stepfather to Lynn’s adult sons, a good grandfather to their children and as a great uncle and role model to my nieces and nephews on both sides of the family.
I am Getting Old
I have managed to make it to the point in my life where I receive regular solicitation letters from the Neptune Society and long-term care insurers. I was getting old!
I was just starting to think about retirement and on which Central American beach I would live out my days.
Now I am looking forward to the day I get to post on Facebook that I had just received a letter from the AARP and Gerber on the same day. (Do they still have Gerber?)
We Were Closed for Business
Having a baby at 52 was definitely not part of the plan. Lynn wasn’t supposed to be able to get pregnant, so we never even gave it a second thought. I won’t go into her private medical history, but she was effectively closed for business.
A Natural Solution
In 2015, Lynn began using a natural supplement, which reportedly used by athletes to facilitate the healing process. Since she was focused on another area of her body, we didn’t even think that it might possibly heal her uterus. Boy were we surprised.
Lynn was also drinking mistletoe tea, which apparently helps regulate her blood pressure. What we didn’t know was that mistletoe tea also is known for increasing fertility in women. So, essentially we were rolling the dice and didn’t even know it.
Still in Shock?
I guess that it is possible that the shock has not completely worn off, but that doesn’t mean that I am not excited, afraid, worried, thrilled, stressed, happy, intrigued, and so much more to be starting a family at 52. Who doesn’t want to be 70 at their child’s high school graduation?
I am sure that I am still getting used to the idea. After all, we had a plan.
We were getting married on May 29, 2016 and we were planning our lives together. We were known for our constant traveling, with many of our friends openly teasing that we were never at home … and they were right.
Change is Good, Right?
All that has changed. Since we have a high risk pregnancy and since Lynn is due on July 1, 2016, her high risk doctor gave us a delivery window from late May to mid June.
Our response, “Holy crap … We can’t do that; we’re getting married then!!!” He said, “No, you’re not!”
We had to call the venue, the DJ, the photographer and everyone who was sent a ‘Save the Date’ magnet.
Imagine the phone calls; “We have to move the wedding! Is this date good for you?” My mother, brother and his family already had their plane tickets!!!
The DJ, an old family friend who was the DJ at both of my brother’s weddings said, “I’m booked, but for you, I will make a change.” Sometimes it’s good to be me! So, the wedding has been moved to October 30, 2016.
Eyes Wide Open
As you might guess, my life has been one crazy and exciting event, followed by the next since that morning. I think that the deer in the headlight look just may just be eyes that are wide open to an uncertain future, which Lynn and I will create together with our baby boy, Daniel John.
It Can be Traumatic
Apparently, hearing the news that you will be a father for the first time, especially if it wasn’t expected can be traumatic.
Here are some links to some great articles which will help you deal with the stress and believe it or not the depression some men have as a result of having a baby:
Here is one for after the baby is born:
By Bill Robertson